Below are some thoughts from earlier this month, originally typed out on a Moto G 2014 with an unreliable Logitech bluetooth keyboard that has also since been disposed of.
I saw an article about a homeless man losing his tent in a fire. He said he lost everything. Everything he had was in a small tent, just a few feet by a few feet wide.
I have been going through my bedroom to clear out things I no longer need, things that I have stored for long periods of time without use. Many are sentimental or old items. It seems to be a shame to throw out something that’s been kept for such a long time. To me, they have historical value and can never be replaced. But at the same time, there are probably billions of people in this world who possess things from decades or even centuries ago. Multiplied throughout humanity, what’s one or two old items from my closet?
In these past months, there have been times where I have asked myself the question, “what if there was a fire, and all your things were destroyed? What would you do?” I would be like the homeless man, with no more physical possessions, but at the same time I would no longer be burdened by such possessions. I would be free to move wherever I wanted without having to worry about where to store my things, what to bring, what to leave behind. These things that are old and that used to be play a huge role in my life that no longer do. Every so often my eyes sweep across them on the shelf when I turn my head around the room. I want to pull one out, open it up, and take a look inside, but I never do. Only when I finally started identifying what to say goodbye to did I open them up.
I want to revisit this post I wrote in 2013. At the time, I said that there are some items in my life that are off limits to disposal, but now I’m not so sure. I’m not even sure I still regret selling all my Genesis games – it may have been a blessing in disguise.
In my more recent post about growing up, I mentioned clinging to childhood. I’m cleaning out my room now, it’s taken 3 months with lots of scanning and recording. I still want to hold on. The most drastic one is the bear my parents got me when I was a baby. It is older than I am. It was always considered untouchable, but recently I put it in a trash bag, and it didn’t seem so bad. Also, when we were in Hong Kong, we didn’t see many of these childhood items, and we were fine.
We’ve talked about going back to Hong Kong, but I don’t really want to do it just to get our independence back. I’ve finally gotten over HK. We could use the time and money to do it here. I don’t want to deal with the crowds, the lack of space, and most of all, the bad air.